The Big C
Well, I got the dreaded word no one wants to hear last week. Cancer. My first mammogram came back suspicious, and a second one confirmed the first. I went for a biopsy a few days later, and the next day, the radiologist gave me a call. I have stage zero carcinoma (DCIS).
It’s probably the least grim of all cancer diagnoses, if you have to hear the word. The cancer is contained within a duct, and they are pretty sure the cells have not breached the duct wall. So it’s a matter of getting the offending tissue out with a partial mastectomy, then a follow-up regiment of radiation. If all goes well, I’ll end the whole thing with a 5% chance of getting cancer in that breast again.
Pretty hopeful, right?
My mom had breast cancer, and so did my sister. Theirs were more advanced than mine, and the necessary treatment was much more difficult. So seriously, I’ll feel like a wuss if I allow myself to freak out about mine. What may lay ahead for me pales in comparison to what they endured. Bravely endured, I might add.
But even so, the dread of what lies ahead is a thing for me. As I was praying over the situation this past weekend, the Lord impressed on me: any suffering I would encounter, He would use for His glory and purposes. (That’s in the Bible, by the way.)
So what will that look like? Only time will tell.
I keep thinking about Paul, when he wrote to the Philippians about leaving his past credentials, accomplishments, and family ties behind. His claim to a relationship with God was the result of none of those things. That came through faith alone.
But then he wrote: “I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them rubbish so that I may gain Christ…not having a righteousness of my own…but that which is through faith in Christ…
… that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings…” (Philippians 3:8-10).
The idea of “fellowship of His sufferings” sounds kind of like a club to me. I’m thinking it’s a pretty big club, actually. People rarely choose to join—they are more referred to it by their primary care person—the Great Physician. A new membership often comes quite unexpectedly, usually in less than pleasant circumstances.
And what is the benefit of being a card-carrying member of the Suffering League? It is an opportunity to go deeper with the Lord.
We get insight into Jesus from suffering that we can’t get anywhere else. He was a suffering Savior. He came to suffer and die.
You know what they say: You can’t know someone unless you walk a mile in their shoes.
You get the picture.
So I was thinking about that, and thinking that maybe the dread I was experiencing was a tiny taste of how Jesus felt in the Garden of Gethsemane. He agonized over what lay ahead. Maybe my dread gives me just a little bit of insight into his heart on that terrible night.
I wonder what else I will learn in the next few months? I’m pretty sure there will be lots to share. So in addition to the other things I like to blog about, I’m thinking to keep a running record of what God is teaching me over the next few months. I want Him to get the glory from the whole experience. So keep checking back—if you are interested in that sort of thing.
It’s a new normal, for a season.
I’ve had other tough times, and I can tell you this: I’m not sorry for any of them. Of course I would never have chosen any of them—I’m not crazy! But I can look back and see the growth and understanding that came from a place of suffering, and know it was worth the cost.
It’s going to be interesting. And I already know I won’t be sorry I had to go through it. No matter how this thing ends. (To read my next post on this, click here.)
No Comments
Author, speaker, Bible teacher. Ice cream connoisseur.
Recent Posts
Recent Comments
- on Be Perfect?
- on Be Perfect?
- on Persuaded
- on Persuaded
- on Persuaded
The Conversation
Julie,
. I am so sorry to hear this news. But, I am with you, Sister, in understanding how with grow through pain.. Jesus will be there with you like never before.
I love you, my Sister in Christ
Karen Lonaberger
Thanks so much, Karen. I’m getting used to the idea. I appreciate your encouragement!
The big C! We are here with you and for you in this thing, whole hog. As a member of the club (via a different route), I know this isn’t the first time you’ve joined the ranks, nor will it be the last. This opportunity will end, you will heal, and eventually you’ll get another referral when it’s time to level up on that intimacy with God. I will hate watching you suffer but I will hold tight to God as I watch Him work in you and through you. Love you, momma. If you need me, I’ll be at the hospital holding your Twizzlers for you and painting your nails.
Good to know you have my back, Mel. On the Twizzler thing.
Praying for you.
Love you, Jen!
Julie…not the news anyone wants to hear ever. For themselves or for a loved one, and I’m so sorry that this is the refining fire you must walk through. But I also believe that you will have some sweet and sacred moments with Jesus unlike any you’ve had before in the days ahead. Know that you are a blessing to us and you will be prayed for in our house.
Thanks so much, Lori. I am looking forward to what He has in store! Everything has meaning when you know the Lord. And I am at peace about this. I don’t know how people survive it without Jesus.
Praying for you. I am a 14 years breast cancer survivor. I didn’t want to be part of the “breast cancer” group. But, I have learned many lessons along the way and have been able to help others on their cancer journey.
I love the success stories. And you are an example to me of how God can use this in helping others. Thank you for your service!!
Praying for you, Julie. Love your reflections. My daughter (15) asked me just yesterday if cancer is genetic. Some are, I told her. We were discussing cancer because her 6th grade teacher just passed away on Monday from a lymph cancer. I will share your story with her. 💕
Thanks so much, Susan! I did get genetic testing and it came back negative, which is a big relief! So that means I haven’t passed any bad gene (that we know of) down to my kids, which was a big concern for me. Your daughter has seen her own share of suffering at such a young age–I prayed for her every day she was ill. So glad she had a full recovery! We missed you at the 40th reunion.
You are very much in my thoughts..You are a very strong person that I hope will do all the doctors that specialize in this field recommend .
Thanks, Liz! I do have excellent doctors–the breast center here is well-known on the east coast medical people for its up to date care and expertise. I’m in good hands!
I’m so sorry to hear this Julie. What a great attitude! He is already receiving glory through your example and your willingness to be used by Him through this trial. God bless and keep you through it all! Love and prayers.
Thanks so much, Chris. May He always receive glory–no matter how this all turns out! It’s what life is all about, after all.
Hi Julie,
Praying with and for you …I had a minor cancer (cervical) 27 years ago. Was treated and it was the end of the story (for the cancer….not for me!) It never returned. And three years ago I had several breast and lymph node biopsies and, praise God, they were negative. But it looked bad for a while. I well remember the heart-in-your-throat feeling as you waited for the word as to what you are dealing with, I promise to pray for you. I tried to sign up for updates but got the message that this feed was not equipped for updates. (?)
Cynthia, I know you are a member of the suffering league…maybe even a vice president! And God has taught you so much. You are my hero! Thank you for the support and prayer. God is good.
Julie: Like everyone else, I’m sorry to hear this news, even though the prognosis is good. I appreciate your transparency and how you are anchoring your heart and mind to your faith — your hope is in Him. Praying for you.
Thanks so much, Beth!
You are already bringing glory to God through this in this blog! Sharing your insight is going to be a blessing to many who are in the midst of suffering, and those who have yet to face it. Love you, Julie! 💕
I sure hope so, Laurie. 2 Corinthians 1:4-7. There is always a purpose!
Hi Julie, Today I received an article in my email called Mommy Guilt, I was so thoroughly thankful for this timely word from the Lord I had to find out more about the author so I clicked on the link, which I never do, and now here I sit, gobsmacked, speechless…marvelling, be encouraged . Be encouraged, and thank you for keeping it real and sharing, I’m pretty sure our Father in Heaven is with you.
I’m so glad you found me! Thank you for those encouraging words. I hope what you find here will continue to be used by the Lord in your life. Thanks so much for commenting!!
[…] right now? Julie shares what God is revealing to her in her current battle with breast cancer on her blog. Check it […]