Selective Memory

When my children were little, they constantly argued and fought. Nothing I did seemed to make a difference. Remembering how often my sister and I fought as children, I approached my mom for advice. “How did you deal with Margie and me when we fought?” I asked.

“Oh, you girls never fought,” my mother assured me.

I might have believed her had I not retained a distinct memory of throwing my little sister across the room over a missing jigsaw puzzle piece. Oh, we fought, alright.

Memories can be deceptive. Like my mom, some tend to block unpleasantness and remember only the good of the past. This is actually why women can have more than one baby. As my labor pains began to get intense with baby number two, I suddenly remembered why I elected for an epidural during delivery number one. Until that moment, I honestly didn’t remember the pain. It’s a good thing, or Adam could possibly have ended up an only child.

The nation of Israel was like that. They had a selective memory. Although God had already demonstrated His mighty power to them with plagues, parting the Red Sea, and in providing food and water in the desert, when it came time to trust Him for their future, the Israelites revolted. “Would that we had died in the land of Egypt! Or would that we had died in this wilderness! … Let us appoint a leader and return to Egypt.” (Numbers 14:2, 4) They preferred going back to Egypt to going forward in trust.

What?? Egypt? Land of cruel slavery? Where the murder of Hebrew baby boys was the preferred Egyptian method of birth control? Where life was bitterly hard?

We shake our hands at their inexplicable short memory. Yet we are guilty of the same mistake at times. When things don’t go as we planned, we might be tempted to look longingly at our “uncomplicated” past. Having a relationship with Christ is harder than we thought it would be. Life was simpler when we lived only for ourselves.

In light of our selective memories, it is a good idea every once in a while to look back at the bleak picture of our “before” screen. We were spiritually dead (Eph 2:1), slaves of sin (Rom 6:17), enemies of God (Rom 5:10), without hope (Eph 2:12), and condemned to an eternity of suffering and spiritual death (Rom 5:18). All of us were under the wrath of God.

Paul wrote the Ephesians: “Remember that you were at that time separate from Christ. . . having no hope and without God in the world. But now in Christ Jesus you who formerly were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. For He Himself is our peace. . .” (Eph. 2: 12-14, emphasis mine). The good old days weren’t exactly all that good. Remembering can be an enlightening reality check.

Many of the psalms do this very thing for the reader. Psalm after psalm recounts God’s wonderful acts. They remember His goodness to each generation. They also recall Israel’s failure to remain faithful to Him and God’s faithful response. The reminiscence serves to keep our feet planted in reality.

Recording the times when God shows Himself to us is a great way to enable us to remember when we hit a bumpy patch on the Narrow Road. My husband and I have specific times God unmistakably provided or led us in our 29 years of marriage. We recall those instances in times of trouble to reassure ourselves of His faithfulness. It enables us to take our eyes off our circumstances and place them on the Lord of all circumstances.

Don’t forget to remember.